Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Walker Texas Wednesday

When my oldest was only three, he loved to watch "Walker, Texas Ranger" with his Dad. Only according to him it was "walkser tixas ranger". Eventually he grew out of his Chuck phase....I don't think my husband ever will.

So, I bring you WALKER TEXAS WEDNESDAY:



Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

When the boogyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.

10 comments:

tiburon said...

OH MY GOSH. You just made me shoot Lo Carb Monster out my nose.

I want to copy this and put it on my blog. Mostly because it is the greatest blog post ever!!

veronica said...

Glad you like it! Copy away!
These Chuck facts are all over the web. I have 30 pages of them. Should I make this a weekly thing?

tiburon said...

I should say so!!

I added you to my shares. But I LIKEY!

Vennesa said...

Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.

Vanessa said...

OMG!!! So funny! He punches himself in the back of the head!! HAHAHAHAH! Yes, a weekly thing would be awesome. But not as awesome as Chuck Norris.

Kristina P. said...

So, I did a post about Jack Bauer from 24, months ago, and I said that if Chuck Norris was gay, he would be Jack Bauer.

Tough call, with that one.

Kristina P. said...

Ummmm, don't mind me, but I got it backwards, if Jack Bauer was gay, he would be Chuck Norris. Go Bauer!

Omgirl said...

I can honestly say that I have never watched a Chuck Norris show ever. But I still thought that was a super funny post! And thanks for crashing my party. :)

Anonymous said...

I flippin can't stand Chuck Norris, but I LOVE this post! Very funny!

Mindi said...

you know how i feel about the chuck.

he can do magic.